


Twice As Shy

by spicywatson



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: F/F, First Kiss, Fluff, Happy Ending, Misunderstandings, Pining, nygmobs is mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-24
Updated: 2019-06-24
Packaged: 2020-05-19 03:53:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19348960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spicywatson/pseuds/spicywatson
Summary: Barbara has something she needs to say to Tabitha.





	Twice As Shy

“Hey Tabby.” It’s the first thing she manages to say, the only thing she can really bring herself to say at the moment. She’s afraid of what comes next.

With a surprising aura of confidence, Barbara struts closer to where Tabitha is perched at the deserted bar (on the counter, of course), sipping slowly at her cosmopolitan. Barbara desperately wants a drink as well, but she reminds herself to stay fully sober for this. She discreetly wipes her sweating palms on the legs of her pantsuit (the silver one that Tabitha has complimented her on multiple times).

Tabitha turns to face her, offers her a warm smile that nearly stops Barbara’s heart. She’s flat-ironed her hair, gathered it into a high pony-tail, and paired the style with that gorgeous studded leather jacket. A touch of gold glitter and bold black liner around her eyes makes her look even more striking. Barbara is sure she’s never seen a more beautiful woman in her life.

“What did I tell you about sitting _on_ the bar?” Barbara teases, voice smooth and sweet as honey (or at least she imagines it is- her hands are shaking and her heart is pounding but hopefully she hides it well enough).

Tabitha rolls her eyes affectionately, knowing how particular Barbara can be, and she slides off the counter and onto a bar stool. “Better?” She quirks an eyebrow as she takes another sip of her cocktail. Tabitha continues eyeing Barbara for a moment before giving her another smile. “Your hair looks cute like that, Babs.”

“Oh this old ‘do?” Barbara purrs, fluttering her eyelashes and flirtatiously twirling a blond strand around her trembling fingers. She usually manages to pull off the charm. Be suave, be sexy. Cool and confident. But this isn’t like all those other times. Barbara hates wearing her heart on her sleeve. It leaves her vulnerable, open to being used and broken and cheated and lied to. There are so many ways people could use her affections against her. She’s always detached herself from love, doing her best to distance herself and prepare her heart for the breaking. But it’s different with Tabitha. At the risk of being called old-fashioned or foolish, Barbara can’t help but believe that this is it. That she’s the one. 

Tabitha’s voice breaks through her muddled thoughts. “Something on your mind?”

 _I love you I love you I love you-_ “Actually… you hungry?”

“Starving.”

\---------------------------------------------------------------

They find themselves tucked into a quiet corner of one of Gotham’s more upscale cafés. The place is dominated by clean lines, minimalist furniture, and modern fixtures. Nearly everything is some unwelcoming shade of slate gray or ivory. Warm rain sprinkles the large windows, the summer heat fogging the glass. It’s not exactly the most romantic of places (Barbara can think of at least five better locales) but it will have to do.

Unable to get comfortable, Barbara shifts around on one of the metal stools, crossing her legs one way, crossing them another way. The glass table between her and Tabitha is so small, they can barely fit their two plates of sandwiches on it. Barbara’s latte nearly crashes to the floor as they try to maneuver their dishes around. This isn’t going well.

But Tabitha makes it all fade away. She sits directly across from Barbara, barely even two feet away. Her eyes glimmer under this lighting, and for Barbara, this is incredibly distracting.

They make light conversation, discussing how well business at the Sirens is doing, how they might change up the look of the club, and eventually straying into gossip. It’s a topic Barbara quite enjoys, as she feels it can give her the upper hand, but she knows it isn’t exactly Tabitha’s favorite point of discussion. A little flickering part of her hopes that Tabitha endures it just for her, a sort of sacrifice out of affection. Out of _love._

“Did you hear Nygma popped the question?” Tabitha says, absently stirring her coffee. Her dark eyes flit up to meet Barbara’s, and it makes her heart flutter in a way she’s not entirely used to. “About a week ago,” Tabitha continues, voice dripping with venom. She certainly doesn’t try to hide her hostility. “Sounds like Penguin’s already going nuts with the wedding planning.”

“So Pengy finally snagged him, huh?” Barbara smirks. She always suspected Oswald was head over heels for Nygma. Maybe it was the constant swooning and heart eyes.

“I heard Nygma _stole_ the engagement ring for him. Honestly I’m not even surprised, considering the way those two idiots are,” Tabitha snorts. “I’ve never seen two criminals act like such _lovebirds._ ”

“Okay, you have to admit, they are kind of cute together,” Barbara says, grinning as Tabitha’s face twists. Of course, Tabitha never particularly liked Penguin or Nygma. They were almost always at odds, but even when they weren’t, Tabitha tried to avoid being in the same room with them. “Good for them!” Barbara adds, laughing.

“I guess…” Tabitha sighs, but the glint in her eyes suggest animosity rather than congratulatory feelings. Then her face brightens again, and she looks a little mischievous. “Too bad you and Jim didn’t work out.”

Barbara chokes on her latte, nearly gagging as she inhales it. “ _What?!_ ” she splutters, wiping at her face with a napkin. Barbara can’t ignore the pang in her heart. It’s so startling to hear Tabitha say something like that, considering how close they’ve gotten. Of course, they’re only _friends,_ nothing more, but would Tabitha really be okay with her hooking up with an ex? _She really doesn’t feel the same? Am I the only one who can barely breathe when she’s near?_ Barbara swallows around the lump in her throat, trying to push down those thoughts.

A little concerned but still smiling with devilish charm, Tabitha exclaims, “It was a _joke,_ Babs. I know how awful Mr. Goody Two Shoes Policeman is.”  
Barbara laughs nervously, shrilly. A bit too loud. “Right! Yes, Jim and I… well, there was no way that could last. I’m glad it’s over,” she says with a wave of her hand. 

Tabitha must have noticed how Barbara is trembling as the blonde reaches for her drink, so she covers Barbara’s hand with her own. “You okay?” she asks, furrowing her brow with concern and giving Barbara’s hand a little squeeze.

 _I’m in love with you I’m not used to this I’m afraid you won’t feel the same I can’t lose you._ “Fine,” Barbara finally chokes out. She wants to keep her hand in Tabitha’s but she withdraws it anyway. _Stupid, stupid, stupid._

A look of hurt flashes across Tabitha’s face and she casts her eyes downward, fingers fiddling with her drained coffee cup. Several moments that feel like hours pass. Then she speaks slowly, hesitantly. “Babs, you know you’re my best friend, right?”

“I’ve never had a better friend than you,” Barbara replies with a kind smile, her heart stinging a little less now. Tabitha seems to warm up again too, thawing the ice that Barbara created when she tore her hand away.

“There’s something I need to tell you,” Tabitha continues, meeting Barbara’s eyes again, “and since you’re my best friend, you deserve to know.”

Barbara holds her breath. _Is this it? Is it really that simple?_

Taking a deep breath, Tabitha says, “I think I… love you.”

There it is. What Barbara’s been waiting, hoping for. And now she doesn’t even remember how to speak, how to move. The air around them is still and feels colder by the second.

Finally, Tabitha scoffs. “You know what? Forget it. Sorry,” she says bitterly, snatching her coat off the back of the chair and strutting briskly out of the café. She’d just poured her heart out, and Barbara had only sat there gaping like a fish, not even giving some indication that she feels the same. But she does.

Barbara slings her purse over her shoulder and dashes after Tabitha, letting the doors slam behind her. She can already feel the humid summer rain frizzing her hair and soaking uncomfortably through the legs of her pantsuit as she hurries down the sidewalk. She reaches for Tabitha, latches onto her arm and holds it firmly, keeping her there.

“I love you,” she breathes, before she can even stop herself. “Tabby, I love you too.” Tabitha’s eyes brighten and widen, and she tries to speak but can’t. Before she can process it, Barbara is tugging her closer by the lapels of her jacket and bringing their lips together. It’s soft and sweet and everything Barbara’s ever wanted. Kissing in the rain. How cliche. How romantic.

When they part and press their foreheads together, Tabitha’s lips curl into a smile. “You’re so cute, Babs,” she says with an affectionate laugh.

“Likewise,” Barbara giggles. She pulls away, offering her hand to Tabitha. “Shall we go somewhere it’s _not_ raining? It took forever to get my hair to look this good for you.”

Tabitha grins, takes her hand and squeezes it. “Of course.”


End file.
